


Loki's Helmet Seduces Hawkeye

by friedpickles



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-22
Updated: 2013-06-22
Packaged: 2017-12-15 20:15:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/853618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/friedpickles/pseuds/friedpickles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Exactly what it says on the tin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Loki's Helmet Seduces Hawkeye

**Author's Note:**

  * For [armintheyard](https://archiveofourown.org/users/armintheyard/gifts).



One day Loki was having a pleasant walk with his horned helmet. He was trying to get used to the obnoxiously large horns that were on it. His official evil fashion designer said all bad guys need a memorable outfit and he was no exception. "Must learn to balance heavy helmet for awesome world domination..." He strained to even mutter. 

Suddenly Hawkeye appeared making strange bird sounds. "Uhhh can I help you?" Loki asked. Suddenly Hawkeye let out a large screech, obviously his mating call. Loki knew this was his chance to seduce Hawkeye. Not that he cared for Hawkeye personally but its always useful to have useless superheros around to do your bidding. He could pretend to mourn him when he died, increasing angst therefore increasing fangirl sympathy. 

"Oh Hawkeyeee Why don't you shoot your strong arrows at my long hard horns" He said trying to act sexy. Hawkeye let out another strange screech, obviously it was working. "Hey baby want to make a nest on my helmet?" Loki asked while swaying his hips weirdly. Suddenly Hawkeye flew up into the air and perched on his helmet. "Mwahaha I knew you could not resist the charm of my helmet!" He exclaimed while laughing loudly as villains do.

From then on out Hawkeye slowly built his nest on Loki's helmet making it more difficult for him to learn how to walk with it on. A few weeks later though one of his evil minions informed Loki that despite his name Hawkeye was not an actual hawk (and that black widow was not actually a spider for that matter). The hawk would not leave the helmet so Loki was forced to get a new helmet for his "Awesome World Domination" (which he failed at anyway).


End file.
